It's been a full week since last I posted. Am I really that blind to the good things God gives? Am I really that lazy not to take time to appreciate the daily reminders of his love? Am I really that stubborn that I would rather be frustrated at my surroundings than take time to thank God for the tough things?

In her book One Thousand Gifts, Ann Voskamp says "We don't have to change what we see. Only the way we see." She also talks about a paradox of ugly and beautiful. When my eyes see "ugly" my heart reminds me that God is the Maker of all things and that "Every good good and perfect gift if from above" (James 1:17). And when I give thanks for the ugly, God transforms it. He transforms me and opens my eyes to see the beautiful.

I am thankful that I'm imperfect.
If I were perfect, life would be bliss, wonderful bliss, but would it be dynamic? As a flawed person I get the privilege of becoming more like God, of experiencing His love in increasing measure. I know everything will be perfect in Heaven, and I'm not saying I won't be grateful when that day comes, nor that heaven won't be dynamic, but I'm beginning to love God's plan for sanctification in this world. I love that I have potential to grow more into the likeness of Christ.

"What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means!" We shall recognize our sin and turn from it and turn toward Love and Holiness.

Sometimes transforming the ugly to beautiful is hard. I need to want to see the world with God's eyes, and I need to want transformation. Today I did what I've been putting off for a while, because it's hard. I've been having a hard time trusting that God put me on this team for his glory. I don't always connect well with my teammates, and I don't always feel "spurred on to love and good deeds" (Hebrews 10:25). Our relationship can certainly look ugly at times.

So I sat and started writing down all the things I'm thankful for about my team. I need to want transformation. To be honest, it was hard at first, but it got easier and I transitioned from writing single attributes to writing a letter to each of my teammates. I do love them. They are God's beloved, how could I treat them any differently? They are beautiful and have a lot of godly attributes, even some that I can learn from. God also revealed sin in my life, mainly stubborness and pride that has prevented me from genuinely thanking him for my team in the past.

“beauty as that which being seen, pleases” -Thomas Aquinas

“And if all the work of transfiguring the ugly into the beautiful pleases God... is there anything in this world that is truly ugly?” -Ann V

26. Julie
27. Bim
28. disagreements
29. my imperfection
30. God's gentle correction
31. God's transforming power
32. coloured pens
33. the power of kind words
34. ice cubes (I do still live in Africa...) 

Had a wonderful evening with the YWAM ladies, providing a little love and getting a lot in return! And I got to thinking, I'm really thankful for memories. How many animal species have memories? Some can recognize because they remember each other, but how many can remember specific events, events that brought joy or laughter? On that note, how many other creatures actually experience joy and laughter the way we do? None, I think!

My former camp coworker and very good friend of mine was one of these ladies, and we had a lot of laughter tonight, singing silly songs and reminiscing with great stories, and I am so thankful for that! But even more than that was the joy that came from connecting with new people, creating new stories filled with laughter that will certainly be reflected upon in the future!

And last but not least, due to our late night out, we drove back through town at a later-than-usual hour and experienced minimal traffic! The true gift in this, for me at least, was that there were no other vehicles to fill the air with smog and for the first time in Kampala I smelled purple! At least, I think it was purple, nonetheless it was a wonderful end to a day, smelling those flowers was God's little wink reminding me that His gifts are infinite.

21. Memories of good times
22. Variety in personalities, a.k.a. God's creativity
23. Giggles.
24.  Safety on dark roads without street lights
25. Clean air and the smell of purple

It's days like this that I'm really thankful for wise friends with listening ears and godly advice. 1 Thessalonians 5:18 says to give thanks in all circumstances, but how often are we willing to do that? How often am I willing to give thanks for the things that frustrate me, even for my own shortcomings and failures?

Though, that makes me ponder. I see that am far from perfect, I get frustrated at people and at situations and sometimes I'm to blame. But there I also see potential. I have the glorious opportunity to learn more about Christ and to become more like him, become better.

When I view my weaknesses as potential, as opportunities for God's strength to take effect, I pull up my bootstraps and, by his strength, I press on. And for that I am thankful. I've discovered a few gifts today.

16. a friend who is not unable to sympathize
17. wisdom
18. a Friend who is not unable to sympathize (Hebrews 4:15)
19. skype
20. infinite potential to know more of God

As I was sitting around the house doing work today I got to thinking about today's gifts. Why is today special? What do I have that others don't have and that I easily could not have? Here's a few things I thought of:

12. a hot water shower
13. crispy olliebollen and the ability to carry on traditions a world away
14. the feel of grass on bare feet
15. laughter of friends

As human beings we're often obsessed with ourselves. How can I get the most happiness? What can I do to feel most joy? Well, today I was reminded that one of the things that gives me the most joy is seeing it in others.

Today I met up with Britt, a friend from home, who is heading up a team of girls for ministry in Kampala area. I remember being in this country for the first time and feeling wonder and curiosity, but today I relived it all watching those girls see wonder everywhere they looked! The motocycles, the pop in the stores, every little thing! These are the things that remind me of God's smile.

9. giddiness and wonder in the eyes of others
10. solid hugs
11. energetic young people flying miles away from home in order to spread a little love

As we gear up for the new year each and every one of us can look back to the year that just past and point out what we are thankful for. And how many things are your list? Five? Twelve? Thirty? Is that all? There were 365 days last year, there's three hundred sixty-five things already! I hope I have more than that to be thankful for at the end of this year!

So what are the gifts in today? Today is a gift. I woke up in a safe place, among friends, and proceeded to breathe air for the hours that followed. The temperature is a gift! It's the third day in a row that it has been 18 degrees out. After the unrelenting heat of our days here so far, this “cool” weather has been quite the treat. Also, a few weeks back I got a Christmas delivery from my family. This may seem trite, but I am so thankful for the peppermint chapstick I got! It reminds me of home and the “smells of Christmas” that I took a hiatus from this year. What else?

1. Today
2. Cool temperature
3. Easy access to all the ingredients needed to make pancakes
4. Pancakes!
5. Spontaneous and uncontrollable laughter.
6. A comfy chair and a good book.
7. Peppermint chapstick
8. Butterflies on the bushes